Cultivating daily happiness is a practice, and here are some tips to help you develop sustained happiness in your life.
#1. Have a dream
Right now, pause. Whatever you are doing, pause and take a breath. Slow down. Now, drop your attention into your heart and ask
“If all my dreams came true five years from now, what would my life look like?”
Yes, it’s tempting to say – “Well, I would have won the lottery and….” But don’t do that. Instead, allow space for your inner wisdom to present your deepest and most cherished dream with your next breath. Maybe your dream is to begin a new career or move abroad, write your book or run a thriving business affording you the freedom to live with passion and ease. Whatever presents, take it into your heart. Have a dream, and dream big.
#2. Dream your Dream
Life can be full of mundane must-do’s, should-do’s and have-to’s. It can also be an exciting and exhilarating ride filled and fuelled by what you love and are working toward. The only difference is your mindset. Knowing your dream means you have something to focus on, like a north star that will guide your daily choices and decisions. Every morning, create space to remind yourself of your dream and call it to mind throughout your day. That way, the ever-present mundane will become smaller and less heavy while you become lighter and look forward with progress.
#3. Hang out with positive people
This one is obvious, and although it’s not always possible to avoid spending time with negative Nellies. But making time for positive people is possible, uplifting and inspiring. Personally, I feel it’s like hitting the reset button on my sense of passion for life and all that’s in it. Think of who inspires you, the people who lift your spirits, those who make you laugh, get you thinking and cause you to look at life in a new way. Arrange more time and activities with them. Perhaps suggest going for a walk, meeting for lunch or spending time doing shared hobbies and interests. Nurture these relationships. Your future self will thank you for it.
#4. Spend time in places that inspire you
Depending on who you are and what inspires you, these places will most likely be nature, high in the mountains, deep in wise woodlands, long stretches of sandy beaches or the stillness by the lakeside. Equally, they could be vibrant cities with splendid architecture, cosy coffee shops and eateries wafting with local produce and vibrant streets bellowing with culture. For me, it’s all of the above because each place opens the mind beyond the everyday, reminding me that there’s always much more. When you spend time in these places, remind yourself of your dream, keep your mind open and allow your inner wisdom to guide you forward.
#5 Be Curious
Take a moment to pause again. Now, call to mind a baby or young child. With your mind’s eye, look at their face. They are wide open to everything they see, feel, hear and touch and are never bored. Their only needs are love, warmth, food, shelter and belonging – then the child is happy.
When was the last time you really stepped outside your front door and took a moment to feel the air on your face and take in the fragrance of the landscape? When was the last time you really listened to a loved one (or anyone) when they spoke?
Little children are fully present. They are experiencing the world for the very first time with no pre-conceived notions or ideas. Imagine living in this way – fully present and alive – Doing so doesn’t mean abandoning your wisdom; rather, practising being open and curious about what’s here with a beginner’s mind. As adults, we develop likes and dislikes, rarely pausing to examine why we avert and dismiss some things. The next time you notice your mind shut down an idea (which it inevitably will), reset and practice being curious instead. I promise you will feel lighter, your intuition will strengthen, and you will be open to new experiences that will increase your confidence, broaden your sense of self and cultivate your happiness.
#6 Wonder
Similar to curiosity, having a sense of wonder opens the mind to all that’s here. Wonder also brings us fully present at a much deeper level than when on autopilot. Instead of rushing through our day without noticing the majestic intelligence within and around us, take a moment to pause and notice. You can begin by noticing a flower or blade of grass, really seeing it, breathing with it and engaging in the sense of wonder around its life. You could also see problems and challenges with a sense of wonder and openness to resolving. In this way, you open your mind and allow space for new perspectives and more options to rise to the surface. Wonder allows us to see beyond the pale and the opportunity to connect beyond limitations.
#7 Meditate
The art of meditation has been around for thousands of years. However, the last twenty years have seen increasing evidence of meditation’s benefits in improving happiness and wellbeing. Perhaps you feel that you don’t have time to meditate – if so, remember this interesting find: we only need to meditate for ten minutes per day to reduce stress and anxiety, think more clearly, increase our performance, and make better decisions and improve relationships. So perhaps consider passing on scrolling through social media and opt for a ten-minute mediation instead.
#8 Pray
There is something incredibly grounding about connecting with a higher power. Like wonder and curiosity, prayer connects us beyond what we think we are and aligns us with who we are – stress, loneliness, fear and isolation ease and a quiet, felt sense of calm, trust and belonging enters our hearts. It’s the power of letting go and letting God that creates space for us to be with what is, without judgement and respond with grounded wisdom.
#9 Have Compassion
Try speaking kindly to yourself and feeling angry or chaotic simultaneously and notice what happens. Additionally, think of someone who annoyed you recently or perhaps ‘ruined your day’ and silently extend compassion toward that person. Hold that compassion momentarily, and then see if you are still as annoyed. I always say that compassion is like the wise soul that enters the room, and once present, everyone intuitively knows that everything will be okay. Compassion and wisdom go hand in hand, and when self-compassion and compassion for others are present, strength, connection and happiness are present too.
#10 Be kind to you
How have you been treating yourself lately? How is your self-talk? Is it filled with kindness and self-love, acknowledging your strengths and how hard you work, the depths of your commitment and how much you give? Or is your self-talk berating, insisting you should do more, be better, try harder and not good enough?
The most important relationship you will have in your lifetime is the one you have with yourself. Mind your thoughts, become aware of your self talk and apply this guideline:
“If I wouldn’t speak to a friend, colleague or loved one in this way, I am certainly not going to speak to myself like so either.”
We all have insecurities and imperfections; it’s part of who we are. Instead of insisting on some overrated illusion called perfection, catch your self-berating thoughts, nurture the relationship with yourself and be kind to yourself. The effects are instant and have rich sustenance that cultivate happiness.
#11 Practice Gratitude
We all know this one, and hopefully, you know how powerful practising gratitude is. The simple practice of focusing your attention on what you are grateful for each day is evidentially one of the most profound practices to cultivate happiness. We also know that we get more of what we focus on, so why wouldn’t you practice focusing on what you are grateful for, the big things, the small things and all that holds meaning for you?
On that note, thank you for reading and I hope you gained value to cultivate more happiness in your days. If so, feel free to send me an email info@hilaryconnor.com. I would love to hear from you.
If you are interested in learning more about cultivating your happiness and developing a spiritual and mindful practice to enhance the joy in your life, why not attend my upcoming retreats this Autumn? Email info@hilaryconnor.com to express your interest, and I will send you all the details.
For now, wishing you happiness and joy.
Warmly,
Hilary
